...

fuck...

well to tell u guys da truth ak da bosan dgn idop ak..sume benda yg ak bwat sume nye xbtol..bangang..ak pon x tau la ape masalah ak sebenarnye...ak pon x tau kat mne yg ak bwat salah..

fyi, ak ade repeat satu paper..chemist..bangang..mase kat maktab result chemist ak cam anjing..so msuk u ak bajet nak blaja btol2..n i did..ak score every test n every quiz dgn harapan ak blh call cikgu mazlini ckp ak da blh bwat chemist..in d end ape jd..ak difailkn xm..bangsat tol...ak ade bwk notes secare x sengaje n ak mmg x tgk langsung notes tu...cite dye panjang gile ak mlas nak type..ak ade sbb sendiri knape ak terbwk...carry mark chemist ak blh dikatekn klu ak score setengah je final blh dpat A...bodo kene repeat..sem ni ak pack gile jadual..so ak x sgt msuk class chemist lect baru nie..baru2 nie ak test..ak dapt sume jwpn btol..tpnye markah ak bnyak kene tolak sbb jln kire ak laen dgn lect baru...bangsat,mase quiz ak bwat n dlm class dye x pnh tgur pon,actually ak xmara sgt kat lect sbb dye agak baek..

ak jz bengang sbb pointer ak da jatuh cam anjing..ak pon da xtaw nak start dr mane nak betolkn bnde nie..so ak da berazam blaja btol2..n ak btol2 blaja..ak hampir xde life.ak xde sape nak ckp..asik blaja cam bangng..ak jarang kuar...n ak x blh terime if test or quiz ak markah below than 75%..sbb nye ak nak betolkn pointer ak...setan, parents ak da sacrifice bnyak gile..ak da la plng bodo dlm family..kakak2 ak sume dekan every sem,sume dapat scholar..adek ak lak mmg pndai asik2 dpt strights a's...mak ak sendiri ckp dye xnmpak ak nyer mase depan..pas ak dgr dye ckp mcm tu..ak trust broke down...tolonlah ak da xnak fail lg..n i trying my best not to..

then td ak dapat result physic 2nd test ak...kimak tol...1st test ak ak dapat highest dlm class...n ak sikit pon x bangga..n ak rase bnde tu btol2 motivate ak nak blaja lg...tgk2 ape jd..test 2 ak fail...kimak..i jz dont know where did i went wrong..ak da siapkan sume assigment..ak da bwat sume totur n ak dapat jwb..even an hour sblom test ak siap ajar kwn ak lg...ak xtaw ape jd..ak jz dont know where my mistake.....

ak btol2 down..bende2 camnie yg bwat ak give up nak blaja..dah la sem nie ak ade 9subject...n 6 of em mmg killer subject...crdt hours ak penuh...

ade satu subject name dye static...sape yg ambik engineerin probarly korng akan blaja...subject nie mmg gile babi susah...ade sorng dak laki class ak siap ngis2 dlm clas sbb x phm...ok..ak mmg kasi tumpuan kat subject nie..n biasenye ak blh jwb..lect ade high hope utk ak dpat a..tpnye lately ntah la...afta like 3 hours pon ak x dpt jwb soklan dye...usually 1 question 1 jam..tp skng 3 hours pon i dint gain nyting..dgg personal problm ak lg..ntah la

ak xtaw..ak rase cam xde beza klu ak blaja n klu ak xblaja..last2 msty ak xdpt jwb gak or ak difailkn... ak da la tension dgn dak umah n class mate ak...class mate ak klu tukar class sekor pon x bgtau ak..bukn sekali..tp da bnyak kali..housemate ak lak prngai cam malaun..umah bersepah2 lg2 bilik ak..ak da la x than tgk tempat bersepah2..eveytime ak kemas skjp je bersepah blk..bangng...da la sume cam shit...sume bnde pon nak kene suro bwat..smyng pon nak kene pakse..come on la..korng da besar...ade skali class ak dr pkol 8 pagi sampai 7 mlm..n mlm lak ak kene stay campus sbb kene bwat presentation..ak blk umah da tgh mlm..tgk bilik cam haram..ak terus xde mood nak blaja..da la baru lepas gado dgn orng yg ak sayang gile...ak xtaw klu gado je msty ak xleh bwat ape2 dgn btol..ak da try nak lupekn tp mmg xleh

ak mmg da lame xpost..sbb ak rase life ak dgn korng sume mmg jauh beza gile....n ak xtaw ak nak ckp kat sape lg..dlu ak ade kwan nak share prob ak..tp skng ak pon xtw dye da g mane,sbb manusia mmg senang lupe..ak ade ramai kwn bile ade prob dtg kat ak..ckp kat ak...cam bangng,,sbb when i need sumone..nobody came..ak xleh ckp bnde nie kat parents ak sbb ak xnak dyeorng risau..ak xleh nak ckp kat kwn ak sbb ak nak granted his/her lifelong wish...td ak scroll no phone like 5 times..n ak xtau ak nak call sape..so sowry arr ak post kat sini..ak mmg lonely gile..ak xtaw nak ckp- kat sape..sbb klu ak ckp ak akan sakitkan ati orng...maybe sbb tu sume orng lari...dlu ade sorng dye x lari idop ak gak stabil till one day ak bwat salah n i never meet dat person again...

help me GOD..i dont see d light..i cant see where am i going, i cant see d future, i cant see my self....this is utterly shitty...life sucks..

no no..only my life sucks..

ak xtaw same ade ak patut post ke x bnde nie....... maybe ak tekan post or maybe not...

damnit

here goes


sorry guys